I’m sitting here finally able to plop on the couch after what felt like an endless day. I am so drained right now. All I can think is, “How is it societally allowed for a woman to be pregnant and stay home with a toddler at the same time?” I mean, I know that this is what I signed up for; it was my choice to be a stay-at-home-mom. But damn. Being pregnant and chasing a two year old around all day is some physically demanding sh*t. It’s not easy having a baby inside and a toddler outside.
We should live in villages
So many times during motherhood have I thought, “This is why people used to live in villages together.” It would make so much more sense for all mothers to live physically close to each other. We could help each other out at all of the different stages of motherhood. Those with no young children and energy to spare could help the pregnant mamas tend to their older children. They could pick up the toddlers so they could see everything above their eye level. They could chase the toddlers around in endless circles for absolutely no reason (other than it’s obviously hilarious, according to the two-year old). Pregnant mamas could help tend to the young babies since they’re slowed-down anyway. And seasoned mothers could share their wisdom with the new moms, and the children. Doesn’t that sound like a dream?
This pregnancy has been a lot harder for me than my last. Every time I say that to my husband he’s like, “That’s because you’re chasing around a two-year-old with endless energy all day everyday!” The more I think about it, the more I agree with him.
It’s so physically demanding
Pregnancy alone is so physically demanding. Chasing a toddler around is physically demanding on its own, too! Put the two together and you get one really exhausted mama. My body feels like it needs so much rest and often I feel like I just can’t give it that. My abdominal wall has already separated 2 ½ fingers width-worth, which is disheartening. And every time I pick my toddler up improperly I know it’s getting worse. I try to be mindful of picking him up with good form, but it just doesn’t happen every time. Sometimes we’re in a rush and it slips my mind. Sometimes he’ll randomly decide to sprint toward the street and “good form” is not exactly a priority.
A couple of months ago we were downtown and his hand slipped out of mine. Of course, he instantly ran off. I had to sprint after him and injured one of my round ligaments. Now the whole ligament on the right side of my uterus hurts every time I hold him. Needless to say we don’t go downtown together anymore unless a third party is present and willing to take full responsibility for chasing him down if he tries to run off. But mostly these days I just avoid going anywhere where that’s a risk. We either stay home or we go somewhere I know will be enclosed enough for him to roam with no danger. I finally found a park recently that’s designed specifically for toddlers and is placed pretty far from the road–score!
It’s a lot
Don’t get me wrong, I love staying home and raising my baby boy (most of the time; let’s keep it real here). He’s at such a fun age right now and I want so badly to be playing at full speed with him all the time. But my body just can’t keep up. It’s busy growing an entirely new human being and basically another organ to go along with it. Especially now that I’ve entered the third trimester, I’m starting to feel a lot more physically limited than before. I also really want to rest and give my body everything that it’s asking for to create the best environment for this new baby boy to grow in. I guess for now all I can do is try my best to find a balance between the two.
Being pregnant is a lot. Being pregnant with a toddler is a lot.
No matter the amount of children…us moms do A LOT.
And that’s the mom tea.
With love,
Jennelle